Advertisements

You Have Been Infected

15 Dec

I wish I could explain the feeling….

So why don’t I just show you.

It’s a little like this

 

 

 

Or maybe it’s like this

Or possibly like this

I don’t know what has come over me. Not that I am complaining, but it is just, well, mind-blowing. I am so on fire, so on point. I don’t know if there really is much that could knock me down. Even if there was something, it would only be a temporary setback.

Although for some people who know me it may seem as if this came out of nowhere, but it didn’t . I know the exact moment it happened

Wanna know when it was, well then let me tell you. It was the moment I walked out of the very first yoga class I ever took in my life, which by the way just happened to be led by my sister Jen. I walked out of that room on a high like i can’t even explain. There were a whole host of reasons why I felt as if I was floating. The biggest reason being that I had just done my first class and made it all the way to the end. It wasn’t a beginners class and I am really out of shape. I attempted all my handstands(with the help of the wall), did as many crows as I could, and did the breath of fire until I thought I would pass out. Within the first five minutes of being there I lost my feeling of insecurity and just went with it. There were some really amazing people in that class, I mean some serious yogis who could virtually levitate on the mat, it was awe-inspiring.
I  begged my sister not to tell anybody that it was my first yoga class, she swore she didn’t. I found out after the class that everybody knew. Not one of them led on the whole time that they knew, everybody was so friendly and supportive.

So ok, it was just a yoga class, but not really. It was a milestone on more than one level. I have always had this fear of taking classes, I worry that people will laugh at me, or think me foolish. So I finally put myself out there and it was a big one, to take a class with people who are dedicated to a yoga lifestyle.  Then secondly that I made it through the class and felt like I kept up made me feel accomplished, cause believe me I wanted to give up more than once.

Okay but that is just one part of the whole life chainging experience. I was feeling sad that morning. I was missing California and thinking about the opportunities that you have when you live there. I didn’t want to go home. Then I walked out of the class looked at Jen and said, “I can make a life anywhere.” I really didn’t think about that declaration again until a few days ago. I realized that I have completely changed since I returned from California. I can’t believe how inspired and full of life I am right now. Of course I have had many moments in my life that were filled with joy, but this is different. This feels really permanent. I think the biggest thing is really that  the joy I feel is about myself. I have always been filled with joy about my children, and my family, but lacked that same spark for myself.

Well, I can finally say it now. I LOVE MY LIFE, I LOVE MYSELF, I AM HAPPY(I MEAN REALLY HAPPY). I AM AWESOME(NOT IN A CONCEITED WAY, BUT IN A IT’S GOOD TO LOVE YOURSELF WAY). I AM WORTHY OF THE LIFE I HAVE ALWAYS DREAMT OF.

I am all those things in spite of all of these things.

I am short

I am 20lbs overweight

I have crooked teeth

i have acne

I am terrible at punctuation

I let my kids watch t.v. sometimes because I need a break

I TALK ALOT, I MEAN I REALLY TALK WAY TOO MUCH

I am not very good at calling people back

I still pay my bills late

But in spite of all those things I still feel good. I feel like I was infected with happiness in California.

I want to infect other people with that same happiness. What if you could be infected with happiness. Why do we commonly associate infection with the bad things like disease. I am going to start a new trend. I am going to start the Happiness Infection. It is simple, if you are truly happy, joyful, and in integrity with your kindness, than the people around you have no choice, they are infected.

So dear readers, go out and start infecting your friends, and family. It is amazing how good it feels to be around people who are also happy like you, it is such a breath of fresh air.

Advertisements

4 Responses to “You Have Been Infected”

  1. James Vincent Knowles December 15, 2011 at 1:53 am #

    “in integrity with your kindness” Wow. I’m gonna steal that. In fact I’m going to adapt & adopt it as a key phrase, as a motto, as an admirable trait, as an underlying truth to all that matters, as a reminder, as a fucking God Blessed prayer for when life sucks, as a meaningful purposeful thing to think everytime I call myself an idiot for some stupidass thing I do or think, as something to consider before I say a n y t h I n g, and, with any luck, as an epitaph… “He tried to live in integrity with his kindness.” Wow. You girls make me weak. Wow.

  2. savasana addict December 15, 2011 at 4:15 am #

    Well, yes – yoga does that to people. Enjoy the journey, it just gets better and better as you progress, promise! 🙂

  3. Dottie Wagner December 15, 2011 at 8:49 am #

    Wow, you infected me!! I am going to bookmark this post on my computer so I can read it anytime I am feeling down, full of self pity, fat, stupid, etc. I too have gotten this feeling from yoga, which I started practicing 4-6 times per week in Feb. It is powerful stuff!! I love your haircut and color by the way!

  4. I December 15, 2011 at 9:00 am #

    Your blog is not only inspirational, but also so comforting to me in so many ways ! I often feel so lost but yet grounded at the same time ( weird, I know), but I accept all of those things as part of me. Anyways, what I am getting at is that I totally relate to this ! Thanks for sharing !

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: