Grant Me Strength

16 Sep

English: This is a photograph I personally too...

English: This is a photograph I personally took when Wayne Dyer came by my television station (KUSI-TV in San Diego) in March 2009. This is NOT a screen shot. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

My heart breaks every time my son cries for food. I feel tremendous sadness every time my youngest son wants more of a treat can’t have it because of his brother. I wish I had more patience on the days where my little guy cries for hours on end and I can’t handle it. If only I could have as much compassion for my self as I did for others. I wish that when my house is messy I think the same thoughts I do when I see somebody else’s messy house, “this house looks lived in, they have busy lives.” I wish that I wasn’t always tired. I wish I didn’t wish for so much.


I am running on very little steam today and I don’t vibrate at a very high level when this is the case. I function on a lower vibration. This leads to confrontation, yelling, little patience, and ugliness that comes from within. It is such a strange sensation to intellectually know that your behavior is shameful, but emotionally you just can’t help yourself. It is like watching yourself in slow motion.

I keep thinking about sleep tonight and will it come with ease. I keep thinking about how Wayne Dyer says that the last 5 minutes before you drift off to sleep are the most important. What you say to yourself in those last 5 minutes will marinate in your brain, your body, your essence for the next 8 hours. I keep thinking about how tonight it will be incredibly difficult not to marinate in the bitter words I feel for what today has been like.

Tomorrow shall be a better day. This week is presenting itself already as full of challenges. All of this madness will culminate with my One Small Step for Prader Willi Syndrome on Saturday and my sister Jennifer’s “Manifestation Workshop” at my studio on Sunday.

God, Universe, Dad in heaven please grant me the strength to handle it all. Grant me the strength to vibrate on my highest level all week.

6 Responses to “Grant Me Strength”

  1. Allison September 16, 2012 at 8:39 pm #

    I am praying for the same thing right now. . I have been suffering from some anxiety issues lately and feeling quite overwhelmed. You really related to me tonight. I love you Rachel, you are beautiful and strength will come to you.

  2. Janet McQuarrie (@diabetessoul) September 16, 2012 at 9:42 pm #

    Sometimes…no matter how many people tell you that you are doing awesome…it\’s hard to accept their praise. But please try to let the love in! As your heart image states…sometimes you just need to open your heart. I am sending you love and healing and asking that you be spiritually supported in the week ahead so that you will have the strength you need to face all challenges. Peace be with you! ♥♥♥

  3. Erin September 16, 2012 at 9:54 pm #

    I totally know what you mean about watching yourself in slow motion but not being able to do anything about it in that moment. It sucks. And it makes me judge myself. Which makes me feel even worse than I already felt for reacting poorly to the situation at hand. Bleh. Hang in there. You are doing a great job. Every day — hell, every moment — is a new opportunity.

  4. authenticalive September 16, 2012 at 10:52 pm #

    Alexa… read this one.. Love You

    On Sun, Sep 16, 2012 at 3:54 PM, 3wordsfor365

  5. barbarapotter September 16, 2012 at 11:09 pm #

    It’s a done deal and don’t first mama will be there tomorrow. 🙂

  6. Sherie September 17, 2012 at 7:42 am #

    what you said pretty much summed up my day yesterday also. I was trying to do too many things at once, this leads to “low vibration”…impatience, frustration, low tolerance etc. I am still shameful of my comment to my daughter (17 with pws) yesterday. She did one of her “prader willi moments” where she wants to go with me somewhere, changes her mind, says she is not going so I start toward the car and then she screams because she wants to go. My response yesterday…”why can’t you talk like a normal person?” Why did I say that? stupid, stupid me!

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