Tag Archives: California
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Music Moves Me

27 Sep

Cover of "Mama Africa"

Sometimes it is a smell that brings me back in time. Sometimes it is an article of clothing I find that jogs the memory. Most often it is music that immediately transports me back in time.

Last night I made a rock and roll playlist for my class. We were just starting to get warmed up and “Killer Queen” by Queen came on. I start dancing immediately, it happens without any thought at all. As my body is moving I begin to realize that I am back in time. I am no longer in Georgia, I am in California. I am hearing this song for the first time on my sister’s stereo. For those of you who follow my sister Jennifer’s blog, you know how much she loves time travel. I love time travel equally, it must be hereditary. I love going back in time, even if just in my mind.

This week I have time traveled quite a bit. 

I was so tired yesterday. Can’t keep your eyes open tired. I was driving to run errands and ‘Mama Africa‘ by Peter Tosh came on my iPod. I was immediately thrown back 23 years earlier. I am 12 years old and spending the summer in California with our dear family friend who let me spend the summers with her. It was the best my mom could do to keep me happy after we left California and moved back to New Jersey. I remember us all going to the beach. The windows down in the VW beetle and Peter Tosh playing on the stereo. I remember the two little ones in the back seat. I even remember how blue the sky was that day. I remember thinking that life couldn’t get any better than this. I also knew right then that I was a lover of Reggae music even from a young age.

When I was in middle school I played field hockey, it’s a NorthEast thing. We used to love piling on the bus for away games. We all had our mix tapes and our Walkman’s.

You would play your jams and get pumped up. It was one of these mix tapes that had one of my favorite songs on it, ‘People Everday’ by Arrested Development. I don’t care who you are this song just makes you want to move. I mean get down. Funky bass lines and horns, I love it all. As this song played on my radio last week I time traveled twice, it was AMAZING. I was 13 years old jamming on the bus and then….it is February 2012. I am going through customs as I return home from my LIFE CHANGING MEXICO YOGA RETREAT. I couldn’t believe who was standing right in front of me, Speech, frontman for Arrested Development. Wearing a pair of overalls splattered with colorful paint. I was starstruck. I wanted to grab him and bust out my imaginary bass and start dancing. I couldn’t help but smile. Such a sad moment that my magical trip was over juxtaposed with the music in me bringing me back, way back.

I have had my fair share of sad and crappy times in my life. Through them all I can always find a song that makes me smile from that stage in my life. When you’re in the midst of a tough time in your life it is easy to see everything through rose-colored glasses.

IT ALL SUCKS, IT’S ALL CRAPPY, IT’S NEVER GOING TO GET BETTER, WHEN WILL I EVER SMILE AGAIN?

The music in you can help you remember all the good times that were happening along the sucky ones. All the good things that you blocked out of your memory. All the good things that couldn’t really be good because everything in that year, that month, or on that day was so bad that good never existed.

The music can bring you back. The music can seduce those good memories back up to the surface.

My take on all of this is simple. You must listen to music everyday. You must move your body and smile, maybe you want to cry, if it moves you than do it.

I am living what I speak. It’s 9am I am on the sofa. I have some really ugly big blue headphones on as I write this. I am playing as much old hip hop as I can find. Every jam is a different decade, a different friend, a different wild experience. My kids are laughing at me as I sing out loud. What a lovely way to start a Thursday.

Namaste and happy singing.

You Have Been Infected

15 Dec

I wish I could explain the feeling….

So why don’t I just show you.

It’s a little like this

 

 

 

Or maybe it’s like this

Or possibly like this

I don’t know what has come over me. Not that I am complaining, but it is just, well, mind-blowing. I am so on fire, so on point. I don’t know if there really is much that could knock me down. Even if there was something, it would only be a temporary setback.

Although for some people who know me it may seem as if this came out of nowhere, but it didn’t . I know the exact moment it happened

Wanna know when it was, well then let me tell you. It was the moment I walked out of the very first yoga class I ever took in my life, which by the way just happened to be led by my sister Jen. I walked out of that room on a high like i can’t even explain. There were a whole host of reasons why I felt as if I was floating. The biggest reason being that I had just done my first class and made it all the way to the end. It wasn’t a beginners class and I am really out of shape. I attempted all my handstands(with the help of the wall), did as many crows as I could, and did the breath of fire until I thought I would pass out. Within the first five minutes of being there I lost my feeling of insecurity and just went with it. There were some really amazing people in that class, I mean some serious yogis who could virtually levitate on the mat, it was awe-inspiring.
I  begged my sister not to tell anybody that it was my first yoga class, she swore she didn’t. I found out after the class that everybody knew. Not one of them led on the whole time that they knew, everybody was so friendly and supportive.

So ok, it was just a yoga class, but not really. It was a milestone on more than one level. I have always had this fear of taking classes, I worry that people will laugh at me, or think me foolish. So I finally put myself out there and it was a big one, to take a class with people who are dedicated to a yoga lifestyle.  Then secondly that I made it through the class and felt like I kept up made me feel accomplished, cause believe me I wanted to give up more than once.

Okay but that is just one part of the whole life chainging experience. I was feeling sad that morning. I was missing California and thinking about the opportunities that you have when you live there. I didn’t want to go home. Then I walked out of the class looked at Jen and said, “I can make a life anywhere.” I really didn’t think about that declaration again until a few days ago. I realized that I have completely changed since I returned from California. I can’t believe how inspired and full of life I am right now. Of course I have had many moments in my life that were filled with joy, but this is different. This feels really permanent. I think the biggest thing is really that  the joy I feel is about myself. I have always been filled with joy about my children, and my family, but lacked that same spark for myself.

Well, I can finally say it now. I LOVE MY LIFE, I LOVE MYSELF, I AM HAPPY(I MEAN REALLY HAPPY). I AM AWESOME(NOT IN A CONCEITED WAY, BUT IN A IT’S GOOD TO LOVE YOURSELF WAY). I AM WORTHY OF THE LIFE I HAVE ALWAYS DREAMT OF.

I am all those things in spite of all of these things.

I am short

I am 20lbs overweight

I have crooked teeth

i have acne

I am terrible at punctuation

I let my kids watch t.v. sometimes because I need a break

I TALK ALOT, I MEAN I REALLY TALK WAY TOO MUCH

I am not very good at calling people back

I still pay my bills late

But in spite of all those things I still feel good. I feel like I was infected with happiness in California.

I want to infect other people with that same happiness. What if you could be infected with happiness. Why do we commonly associate infection with the bad things like disease. I am going to start a new trend. I am going to start the Happiness Infection. It is simple, if you are truly happy, joyful, and in integrity with your kindness, than the people around you have no choice, they are infected.

So dear readers, go out and start infecting your friends, and family. It is amazing how good it feels to be around people who are also happy like you, it is such a breath of fresh air.

You Can Make It Anywhere

12 Dec

What is a family?

I have always moved around in my life. There have been many years where I lived far away from my entire family. So what I learned early on is that I had to make a family for myself, for all the days that I couldn’t be with my blood family. I have always know that people can be family to you, even if that weren’t blood related. I have had the amazing opportunity to have so many amazing friends in my life who I consider family.

In 2006 I moved to 

Unfortunately my family still lives in

This separation brought on a whole new meaning once my kids were born. For those of you who know me, my mom, my dad, and my sister, you know that we are a pretty tight bunch. I know the distance apart is I think just as hard on them as it is on me.

I moved to Georgia knowing not a single person other than Jona, my then boyfriend, now husband. It was really not easy to make friends here. I really struggled, and to be quite honest, that was a first for me.

Now, 6 years later, here I sit happy full of family in my life. I have great friends who are family and now a great family by marriage.

I have always been close with my husbands parents, but as the years have gone on, we have gotten closer and closer. I know of for a lot of you out there, you really couldn’t imagine yourself just going over to your in laws house to hang out, with out your spouse. I DO ALL THE TIME! YOU SHOULD TRY IT, IT’S FUN!!!

I really miss my family, I mean I really miss my family every minute of every day. The thing is this, I had to see that I had other people right in front of me who wanted to help fill that void for me.

In the years since I have been here I have blessed to have made my family grow. I have great girlfriends who are like sisters to me, great in-laws are look after me like my own parents, and I have many more people to meet in the years to come.

To me it is really important, to build and grow relationships that are strong and meaningful.

I really wanted to write this post during this holiday time. Of course this is a time when families get together. For so many people going home is stressful, they don’t get along with their in-laws, they fight with their siblings, or they have to see old friends who have left their life  from the town they grew up in.

Family is what you make it. You can make a family anywhere. If for some reason things are strained with your real family, look to the people around you. You may have a really strong family and didn’t even recognize that it was in front of you the whole time.

There is another really important family in my life it is my PWS family. I don’t know how I would have survived the last 2 + years since Blaise’s diagnosis without them. Every time I meet a new PWS family there is an instant connection, like we have known each other all along. I love this family of mine. Thousands strong and always getting stronger. We are an amazing family. I have never seen a group of people, many who have never met but online, many who are thousands of miles apart, do so much for each other. This is a family like no other I have ever seen. This is a family that at first I didn’t want to be in, but now can’t imagine my life without. Check out our fan page on Facebook to see some of the amazing folks I am talking about.

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